6.03.2005

Get Hard - Go Blind: Who Cares, and other Harmful Fairytales

This is not about Viagra so please don�t leave. I am not quite sure why everyone on the internet has to blog about the fact that Viagra is now noted to potentially cause blindness. Honestly, every other blog on the internet is noting this, as now is this one for that matter; is this that big a surprise to anyone? I mean something that causes such a rush of blood to a certain part of the body is bound to take away blood from another part of the body and in this case the eyes get the short end of the stick so to speak. I don�t know why I am even posting this but I find all those Viagra posts annoying. I don�t care one way or the other, not my problem. I was looking through a whole bunch of boxes today, as my parents are clearing out one house and moving things slowly here, there are boxes of things that only a very vivid imagination could conjure up. I found some really great old books that my mother had saved. These books are great due to the illustrations actually, but they were old fairy tales, volumes of them and even the illustrations looked quite scary. Mother Goose and the Grimm brother�s kind of stuff. I was looking through them and I have to admit I am glad I wasn�t brought up on this stuff. It is no wonder that my parents, and the rest of their generation, are so overly fearful and overprotective of their offspring. Just imagine being brought up on stories where some old lady who lives in the woods (witch) shoves children into ovens, ( and she looks frighteningly ugly too), or where there are wolves in the forest waiting to eat you, or even where there are little men waiting to steel your first born. This is all quite frightening. I mean this: from The Wilful Child by the brothers Grimm. Once upon a time there was a child who was willful, and would not do what her mother wished. For this reason God had no pleasure in her, and let her become ill, and no doctor could do her any good, and in a short time she lay on her death-bed. When she had been lowered into her grave, and the earth was spread over her, all at once her arm came out again, and stretched upwards, and when they had put it in and spread fresh earth over it, it was all to no purpose, for the arm always came out again. Then the mother herself was obliged to go to the grave, and strike the arm with a rod, and when she had done that, it was drawn in, and then at last the child had rest beneath the ground.

I mean can you believe this stuff.

Then there is all that Mother Goose; we know there was no Mother Goose but over time there were a ton of stories and rhymes attributed to that name . These storeis and rhymes were also not pleasant. Cinderella was based on one as was Thumbelina most of these stories have their own sick characteristics I am afraid and caused obvious damage to the psyche of the yuppie generation. Nothing was ever good enough one was always the poor step child and always trying to be better. So having been brought up believing that people were eaten my wolves or baked in ovens or never good enough always wanting to have the glass slipper and marry the prince I can�t blame them for their psychological proclivities. I have to tell you these old illustrations are really nice though. I�m thankful that I was brought up on Eric Carle and Shel Silverstein; I mean how much damage can a book full of awesome colorful animal pictures and poems by the likes of John Gardner and D.H. Lawrence be. These books were in the boxes as well. This is the stuff that I was brought up on. From Eric Carle's Animals Animals The Lizard The Lizard is a timid thing That cannot dance or fly or sing He hunts for bugs beneath the floor And longs to be a dinosaur John Gardner See, no potential perpetrators of fear here. Or mind you this; one of my favorite Silverstein poems. They've Put a Brassiere On a Camel

They've put a brassiere on a camel, She wasn't dressed proper, you know. They've put a brassiere on a camel, So that her humps wouldn't show. And they're making other respectable plans, They're even even insisting the pigs should wear pants, They'll dress up the ducks if we give them the chance Since they've put a brassiere on a camel. They've put a brassiere on a camel, They claim she's more decent that way. They've put a brassiere on a camel, The camel had nothing to say. They squeezed her into it, i'll never know how, They say that she looks more respectable now, Lord knows what they've got in mind for the cow, Since they've put a brassiere on a camel.

Shel Silverstein . This is just plain funny even to a five year old so yeah for my no free and clear from messed up head syndrome Y gen. Some may say this is debatable and they may be correct, but at least our problems are our own; they don�t come from some sad sick fairy tales we were fed as children. They don�t come from MTV either, although that can be pretty frightening, we had those yuppie parents remember, and they were constantly telling us that stuff was crap and none of it was real and we did understand that much anyway. Found a few other weird things in the boxes like my old report cards. Yeah I loved this teacher. ------ seems to manage her time wisely and is never off task, something that is remarkable in a second grader. She does seem to ask a lot of questions more so than the average second grader. I am all for curiosity however and have never believed it killed anything not even the cat. She does do a lot of drawing when I am speaking which in and of itself is not a problem but she uses a lot of the schools paper and when the time comes for her writing assignment she always has to ask for more. If possible, in order to allow her to continue her artistic pursuits during class time, I am requesting that you send in a stack of loose leaf non college ruled paper as well as some plain white paper so as to mitigate this situation. Well as I now have a job I must retire early. This working stuff really is not all it is cracked up to be. I hope I never have to do it for a living.

Yes, my comments are messed up so they go at the top. I am doing the best I can.(sure)

13 Comments:

Blogger mojo shivers said...

I always liked the Grimm Fairy Tales and have wondered about the etymology of the word grim as it relates to the surname. Wouldn't it be a kick in the arse if grim actually stemmed from those fairy tales?

As for Viagra, I'll never use that... again.

6/03/2005 04:16:00 AM  
Blogger Jack Burden said...

There's a great book called "Underground Education" that has some great facts about the origin of fairy tales (and also about how Edison helped invent the electric chair as part of a smear campaign against a competitor).

6/03/2005 02:22:00 PM  
Blogger Jack Burden said...

Aliceinwonderland,

You have been tagged.

Jack

6/03/2005 02:23:00 PM  
Blogger SuperKate said...

Jobs are so tediously overrated. I'm still trying to find one that allows me to do nothing but sit in a bar, drink, look cute, and giggle. The only problem is I'm not into prostitution...

6/03/2005 08:16:00 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I think I've been here before, we have similar tastes, yum. Anyhoo, nice work in here must blogroll.

6/04/2005 05:53:00 PM  
Blogger Dave said...

Hah, yeah I hate stupid blog quizes personally. "What color are you?" "What kind of snowflake are you?" Some people really seriously have too much time. Looks like you succumbed, I guess we all do once in a while though ;)

Main reason I'm commenting though is I love your header image, it's awesome. Very moody and atmospheric and er... familiar. Yeah.

6/05/2005 07:17:00 PM  
Blogger Brad said...

a me me!!! say isn't so Alice... :)

6/07/2005 12:03:00 PM  
Blogger W. S. Cross said...

Cool post, thanks for telling us about yourself.

6/07/2005 03:12:00 PM  
Blogger carla said...

Welcome to the Progressive Women Bloggers webring. :)

6/07/2005 09:10:00 PM  
Blogger zydeco fish said...

Wow, I hda no idea about un chien Andalusia. I love that song too.

6/07/2005 09:43:00 PM  
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